Good People
You hear that a lot down South. ‘He’s good people’ or ‘She’s good people’. I love that phrase on many levels, the least of which is when you refer to one person as the collective, but the most of which is I think what an honor to be called ‘good people’. In my head that says, ‘here’s someone to be comfortable with. Here’s someone in whom you can place trust. Here’s someone that I know, and like and respect.’ I am lucky. I have quite a few friends, alot of whom I think I would call good people on some level or another. I try to tell most of them anytime I think of it how awesome they are. But there are some folks that I’m not sure they know I think of them as good people. And I would refer to them this way for a plethora of reasons. What is sad is that I think none of them realize how much I like them, or admire them for the different reasons I do. So today’s Top Five- my top five ‘good people’ who don’t already know it:
5. My sisters- all of them. They have birthed children, lost children and been unable to have children. They have raised me, to the best of their ability, and loved me anyway, despite how I turned out. They welcome people into their home, even when those people are my children. They help out anytime they can. They support each other and me. They call if I am MIA for any length of time. They let me vent, and love me anyway. They are people that their friends count on. They are good people.
4. Tommy and Richelle- Now, at first glance you will think I am smoking crack. I’m not- just hear me out. These people are good people. I am lucky enough to be friends with these two. They have managed to stay friends through a ton of crap. I don’t know the deepest darkest feelings in either of their hearts, but I know this. These two have a kid together, and they put him first. They don’t argue in front of him, and they make sure he knows they love him. They consider each other when they are working out schedules, and they don’t try to use him like collateral, the way so many divorced people do. They are, simply put, two of the best parents I have ever seen. They are also good at being friends. Not only with each other, but to the rest of us. There are many of us who have been friends with them since before the split. I have never once felt like I was asked to choose sides. I have never once felt like I had to pick one over the other. Somehow they have focused on being decent people, and putting the hurt behind them, and they won my respect a long time ago for the way they handled possibly the most difficult situation two people can be put in. They have acted with a self-less attitude, and I think that’s something. I love spending time with both of these people, and if I can spend time with someone, and they don’t drive me crazy, then I know that’s something.
3. Matt and Tasha- These two people- God, they just love each other. You can’t be around them and not know it. They have acted like an old married couple since they were teenagers, and that much time together makes it obvious to the rest of the world that they love each other. And they aren’t fake and mushy and make you want to puke. They are real, true, bare bones ‘You go get Ivy some milk, because I just went upstairs to take Noelle toilet paper’ in love with each other. They are snarky sometimes and I laugh, but then they say something sweet, or smooch each other in the kitchen without it being a big deal, and you know. You just see it. Frudog will make a comment about her ass, and ask whoever’s in the room ‘Isn’t my wife hot?’ And he waits for an affirmative reply. Tasha will watch him play with the kids in the pool, and tell you ‘Look at my sexy husband’. These two know how to love each other the way people are supposed to love each other. For that reason alone, they are good people in my book.
2. Snotface, aka CoolWhack, aka Cathy- The woman is fun. She is fun fun fun on a very different level than any other girl in my life. She doesn’t care what she’s wearing, and if her hair looks good like that, or if people laugh at what she says, because frankly, people laugh at what she says most of the time. She intends for them to. She is good people because she does not care what other people think, really. I mean- tons of people say they don’t care what other people think, and then they spend 73 hours getting ready to go anywhere. Snotface, on the other hand, does not. She will put a clip or two that she bought for Chloe (and then they wouldn’t hold Chloe’s hair, so now she uses them) into her own hair, and make sure her shirt doesn’t have any visible stains or what have you on it, and she’s ready. She will have people over, and tell you upfront whether or not to bring your kids. You never wonder where you stand with Cathy. When I was little, and someone asked me who would be in my wedding, I said Cathy before I ever thought to include my sisters. When I actually got married, I had been out of touch with everyone I ever knew, and I didn’t ask her. I have always kicked myself that Cathy wasn’t my maid of honor. She should have been. She’s honest, and funny. She’ll ask me about what’s going on with our friends, but she never talks about them behind their back. I respect that. She is also stronger than most people would ever know. I have only seen her cry twice in my whole life. If I ever find out I have cancer, or some horrible inoperable brain tumor, or that I am dying from the bird flu, I will make Cathy go with me to the doctor because she is the strongest woman I’ve ever met. And I’m pretty butch, myself.
1. The hunky Ph- the hunky Ph is good people. And I don’t think a lot of people know that about him. He is quiet. He likes to hang out with his friends, and gets to do it way too little because most of his friends are as busy as we are. He loves to spend an afternoon fishing with a buddy or at the park with me and the boys. He can’t relax if he feels like there are things that need to be done, so he is always just finishing a task, or getting started on another. Anytime a friend needs him, though, they call, and he is right there. I don’t think he’s ever been asked to move furniture, or help cut down a tree, or build a fence or what have you, that he hasn’t said “Okay- when will you need me?” He won’t put that above his family, or time with his children, but he will help if he can. And he doesn’t ask for it very often in return. And he doesn’t hold a grudge when he does ask, and he can’t find a friend to help him. And that happens pretty frequently. He doesn’t have too many friends, but he values the ones he does have. And he values me above pretty much everything, although I don’t know why. He’s loved me with his whole heart since they day he laid eyes on me, and I will never understand why. I will always be grateful, but I will never understand why.
5. My sisters- all of them. They have birthed children, lost children and been unable to have children. They have raised me, to the best of their ability, and loved me anyway, despite how I turned out. They welcome people into their home, even when those people are my children. They help out anytime they can. They support each other and me. They call if I am MIA for any length of time. They let me vent, and love me anyway. They are people that their friends count on. They are good people.
4. Tommy and Richelle- Now, at first glance you will think I am smoking crack. I’m not- just hear me out. These people are good people. I am lucky enough to be friends with these two. They have managed to stay friends through a ton of crap. I don’t know the deepest darkest feelings in either of their hearts, but I know this. These two have a kid together, and they put him first. They don’t argue in front of him, and they make sure he knows they love him. They consider each other when they are working out schedules, and they don’t try to use him like collateral, the way so many divorced people do. They are, simply put, two of the best parents I have ever seen. They are also good at being friends. Not only with each other, but to the rest of us. There are many of us who have been friends with them since before the split. I have never once felt like I was asked to choose sides. I have never once felt like I had to pick one over the other. Somehow they have focused on being decent people, and putting the hurt behind them, and they won my respect a long time ago for the way they handled possibly the most difficult situation two people can be put in. They have acted with a self-less attitude, and I think that’s something. I love spending time with both of these people, and if I can spend time with someone, and they don’t drive me crazy, then I know that’s something.
3. Matt and Tasha- These two people- God, they just love each other. You can’t be around them and not know it. They have acted like an old married couple since they were teenagers, and that much time together makes it obvious to the rest of the world that they love each other. And they aren’t fake and mushy and make you want to puke. They are real, true, bare bones ‘You go get Ivy some milk, because I just went upstairs to take Noelle toilet paper’ in love with each other. They are snarky sometimes and I laugh, but then they say something sweet, or smooch each other in the kitchen without it being a big deal, and you know. You just see it. Frudog will make a comment about her ass, and ask whoever’s in the room ‘Isn’t my wife hot?’ And he waits for an affirmative reply. Tasha will watch him play with the kids in the pool, and tell you ‘Look at my sexy husband’. These two know how to love each other the way people are supposed to love each other. For that reason alone, they are good people in my book.
2. Snotface, aka CoolWhack, aka Cathy- The woman is fun. She is fun fun fun on a very different level than any other girl in my life. She doesn’t care what she’s wearing, and if her hair looks good like that, or if people laugh at what she says, because frankly, people laugh at what she says most of the time. She intends for them to. She is good people because she does not care what other people think, really. I mean- tons of people say they don’t care what other people think, and then they spend 73 hours getting ready to go anywhere. Snotface, on the other hand, does not. She will put a clip or two that she bought for Chloe (and then they wouldn’t hold Chloe’s hair, so now she uses them) into her own hair, and make sure her shirt doesn’t have any visible stains or what have you on it, and she’s ready. She will have people over, and tell you upfront whether or not to bring your kids. You never wonder where you stand with Cathy. When I was little, and someone asked me who would be in my wedding, I said Cathy before I ever thought to include my sisters. When I actually got married, I had been out of touch with everyone I ever knew, and I didn’t ask her. I have always kicked myself that Cathy wasn’t my maid of honor. She should have been. She’s honest, and funny. She’ll ask me about what’s going on with our friends, but she never talks about them behind their back. I respect that. She is also stronger than most people would ever know. I have only seen her cry twice in my whole life. If I ever find out I have cancer, or some horrible inoperable brain tumor, or that I am dying from the bird flu, I will make Cathy go with me to the doctor because she is the strongest woman I’ve ever met. And I’m pretty butch, myself.
1. The hunky Ph- the hunky Ph is good people. And I don’t think a lot of people know that about him. He is quiet. He likes to hang out with his friends, and gets to do it way too little because most of his friends are as busy as we are. He loves to spend an afternoon fishing with a buddy or at the park with me and the boys. He can’t relax if he feels like there are things that need to be done, so he is always just finishing a task, or getting started on another. Anytime a friend needs him, though, they call, and he is right there. I don’t think he’s ever been asked to move furniture, or help cut down a tree, or build a fence or what have you, that he hasn’t said “Okay- when will you need me?” He won’t put that above his family, or time with his children, but he will help if he can. And he doesn’t ask for it very often in return. And he doesn’t hold a grudge when he does ask, and he can’t find a friend to help him. And that happens pretty frequently. He doesn’t have too many friends, but he values the ones he does have. And he values me above pretty much everything, although I don’t know why. He’s loved me with his whole heart since they day he laid eyes on me, and I will never understand why. I will always be grateful, but I will never understand why.
